Things You Shouldn’t Post In Your Online Dating Profile

If only these were common sense

Hoping to find a match online? It’s a superficial world out there and what you post or don’t post says a lot about you. Check your profile for these red flags to avoid scaring off a potential partner.
 
SHIRTLESS / BIKINI PHOTOS
This seems obvious but some people really want to show off their body to potential matches. Keep the mystery alive – you don’t need to get to second base before you’ve even met in person. Also, Windex that mirror.
 
DRINKS. LOTS AND LOTS OF DRINKS
Everyone likes someone who can have a social pint or glass of wine but if you’re holding a bottle in every one of your pictures you come off looking like a bar star or a total waster.
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(Photo by Nick Percell via Flickr)

 
“MAKE ME LAUGH”
What am I, a clown? Is this a comedy show? Unless you bought a ticket or you’re paying admission for entertainment don’t demand laughter from your matches.
 
YOUR PET OBSESSION
It’s great that you’re an animal lover but if you describe your cat as “the love of my life” or your dog as “my special man,” it’s loneliness on a leash. You pick up their poop, so it’s a pretty one-sided relationship and you should probably seek out a human connection.
catlady

(Photo by Heather via Flickr)

 
PICTURES OF YOU WITH A BABY
Some people might see this as cute but to others it’s a squirming, gurgling red flag. And writing the caption “Don’t worry it’s not mine” doesn’t help. Now it looks like you kidnapped someone else’s baby.
 
PICTURES OF YOU WITH THE OPPOSITE SEX
It’s great to show that you have a group of friends, but it looks suspicious if you’re surrounded by the opposite sex every time. No one wants to fight through a crowd to try to get your attention.
 
ANYTHING OUTDATED
Are your pictures from five years ago? Has your bio been the same since you first signed up in 2007? Believe it or not, you’ve changed. Time to update with some new info and new shots that show what you actually look like now.
outdatedpic

(Photo by Kris Kesiak via Flickr)

 
PHOTOSHOPPED PICTURES
Thinking of adding a funny “sticker” or icon to your picture? Don’t. And blurring out friends’ faces OR your ex’s face isn’t the best idea either. Just take some new pictures.
 
PICTURES OF YOU IN FRONT OF A CAR
Nothing says materialistic like posing in/beside/on top of a hot car. Do you even know the owner? Is the car stolen? If you’re looking for someone to pick you up, call Enterprise. Otherwise just be happy if their car isn’t full of fast food bags.
ferrari

(Photo by Adrián Fernández García via Flickr)

 
A NOVEL-SIZED AUTOBIOGRAPHY
A good general rule for writing your bio is keep it short. Try to think of something that makes you unique (we all like to travel, and we’re all “foodies.”) No need to write out your hopes and dreams along with a long list of rules and restrictions here, that can wait until you set up a date.