Surviving Your Work Christmas Party

Time to brush up on those social skills and exit strategies

We’re getting close to work Christmas party season and now is a perfect time to brush up on your social skills and exit strategies so you don’t make a complete ass of yourself in front the people that sign your cheques. Here are a few things to remember:

PACE YOURSELF

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When it’s open bar we tend to be like dogs; we eat until we get sick. Start slow and feel out how quickly people are drinking. If it’s a slop-fest then by all means, slop away! But the feel of the party should be your guiding light. I suggest drinking low alcohol options instead of hitting the hard stuff right away.

KEEP YOUR YAP SHUT

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(Photo: C.C. Chapman via Flickr)

I know you’re full of “Christmas cheer” (that usually means bourbon) and you’re feeling pretty loosey-goosey but it’s still probably not a good idea to tell Sarah you think she’s a “smokeshow”. Or tell Chris that he’s “surprisingly cool for a Mormon”. The less said at these things the better. Use your social compass to see who is a good sport or not but either way, proceed with caution.

HYDRATE

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Throw in a glass of water between every couple of drinks. You probably have to work in the morning and you’ll thank yourself for taking the time to drink some water. This is a far better solution than waking up at 3 a.m. and putting your head under the bathroom tap for 10 minutes.

HEAD HOME EARLY

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Don’t wait until the bitter end, get out of there before it gets gross. All you’re going to miss is an awkward make-out session between two co-workers or maybe an older office member throwing up. You’ll look like a model of self restraint and you can still go meet the homies if you want more drinks.

EAT SOMETHING

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A minor snack-attack will help slow the absorption of your booze and it’s usually free, so get in there. If the party doesn’t have food tell your boss that they’re cheap and get a shawarma on the way home. It will help you from having the kind of hangover that results in spontaneous crying and hiding in the office bathroom to avoid work.