Oscar Mayer Bacon has a new “Wake Up and Smell The Bacon” ad campaign that includes a bacon alarm clock app and a bacon-scented plug-in and while the whole thing reeks of an April Fool’s Day prank (see what I did there) it got me thinking – will the bacon craze ever end?
It’s pretty much the fattiest meat for clogging your arteries, it stinks up the house for days, and there’s a risk of grease burns if you’re cooking without a shirt (not recommended). Don’t even get me started on the animal cruelty that’s found on most pig farms (downer alert).
To keep you satisfied until the bacon bubble bursts, here are some of the most ridiculous bacon products:
Cut yourself opening a pack of bacon? Heal it with bacon.cisco 640-816
Because a candle made out of real bacon grease is probably a fire hazard.
Going to the gym? Replace your body odour with some bacon odour.
Lather up with bacon! (Life-sized bacon buddy with shower cap not included).
The only dryer sheets that will guarantee you get chased by wild animals.
It can’t smell any worse than your boss’ coffee breath.
Now you can be honest when your dentist asks you how often you floss.
Regardless of the flavour, men should always apply chapstick in private.
Try bringing bacon into the bedroom! Just remember, “No means No.”